Jonah ran away. Couldn't face offering those he deemed wholly unworthy a merciful reprieve. Then he died and rose again. A giant fish. Symbol or most remarkable occurrence, who knows, and how far should we care? God knows. And Jonah did/does.

We're here to run to wherever our Nineveh is. A place of compassion.

Being under sin sickness because of reckless behaviour is the worst. Nothing reverberates and crushes like it. Makes for a weakness which isn't the right kind to get up and be empowered through. Puts our eyes on self and a self-ish-ness that spits in the face of Christ and all he did and does. 'Crucified all over again' is one way it's described.

The link to compassion is how less than best always has other-people repercussions. How our selfish ways are by definition excluding of others. We're not here for ourselves. Not according to the call of God. We're here for those who don't want love and help, God and life. At least not generally in cry out and be honest terms.

Not comfortable writing this/this morn. One hit and be quick, yet way too self-centered in its intent. Should remain private. Try and be about communicating -- something, and not so indulge, but... am.

God grieves. In us. What a thought. That we can disappoint and cause God pain. Nothing quite upsets like the abuse of the love and grace so familiar and encompassing. Persistent and passionate. To the one you love, you'd do... what..? How awful this feels.

Calvinist critics talk of limiting God's capacity to the extent of human emotions. We 'open theists' in error. That somehow all and different, God is so beyond, above, and other. What we can read in the Bible -- they say -- is God pretending to be like us. To help us relate. Doesn't actually respond, as written. 'Relents and changes mind'. This a misunderstanding.

With respect, "nope". And one big know how and why is the inner witness when all comes crashing in. Insides churning with God and the loss of -- or, sense of -- position. The knowing and God in conviction is the absence and yet it's us/me who puts up the distance. We who run from...

In some ways, a sent or otherwise storm, is easy to relate and requiring answers to resolve. Or, full of new decisions to ensure a rectified future. Tend to self-discipline and make new amends but the simple solution is do-not-do... Do-what and not-that. Not a complex equation.

Aw-right. To close this awkward post:

The fence compromised and boundaries pushed. Too near the edge -- fall in/out etc. Sick of causing God the extra work and misusing what-have-you. Sick is the word.

Word (think) have is along the lines; we can only go as far as we go ourselves. In, how can we expect any true power in prayer (aka life's purpose)? If we aren't the broken bread and crushed into wine ourselves? There's an incarnation aspect to intercession. We inhabit and imbue the required. Identification in and with. Like God does in becoming the griever in our being. We likewise must shake off and out the me-obsession. Love God and people. Not else.

Boy, hate publishing this. Can't imagine is something would want to read m'self. Ten mins to go... Sorrowful and suppose, this a fitting plea, and "please-God do not need writing again".

'When he saw...'? Hope on. Over-sensitive? Yeah, prob. but roots need fixing in God so the branches bear fruit. Nuff. Said would/so done did.

This blog is substitute 'fellowship' (in absence of...) and platform for confession. Voice prophetics. A prayer letter. And morning meditation and pray on the go. Shameless and resilient output to the One and Only One. True God who is fitting for all praise, honour and glory.

A...