Intentional
A Psalm asks "why so disturbed?" The solution and better perspective in this self-analysis is to trust. And how we can speak, come pray our way, out of the malaise and blues.
An option to run from, or to God, is the leading dynamic. Talk with and do what have to, in ever facing God -or- distract off, and -- yep that the word -- ...run.
Not-disturbed, shows we've already bolted. World and ways should cause an almost allergic reaction to the perpetual sinning. While any and all my own doing along-with what grieves most.
Avoidable and yet...
Disturbed and run, return and disturbed, on/off/off/on. Immature merry-go-round. The only way out is door-shut transforming repentance. With about the only encouragement, knowing -- aka believing deep with conviction -- God is for this. Intentional and calling.
Know don't get anything like the rev. why God is so up for this. Beyond any fool-me overstating and pretend importance, God IS up for, and this open to all.
Keep clean hands and pure heart. Dig in and don't let go. This how it 'feels'. The clock and walk nowhere far. While all-right and disturbed but to worship, love and serve through.
S'pose what am saying to me/to God, is the disturbance increases vitality to seek and meet. All my days in perpetual desperation. Cannot cope without gushing toward the Saviour. Unto Jesus in name and cries. No embarrassment to admit.
Unimaginable now and all the years in self-contained bubbles. The deceiving self-reflection that presumed to be managing. Now God gone done a work, cannot ride on a circumstantial autopilot.
No hunger for the things did. Dropped 'love not the world' last time posted. How negative that can seem, although can interpret as systems and ways. But no... it's all encompassing and 'not love' is a reaction inside not imposing self-discipline.
Look about and the madness and fury is all and about. We've lost something even compared a generation or two ago. Not nostalgic hog-wash or some idealism never achieved.
Anyways who cares and try compare, we are L O S T that's for sure and human interactions manifest this in glaring form. A word describing the direction is isolation. Techno-assisted in a decisive frenzy. All that shows otherwise are families, otherwise a dread zone. Dread-full.
No sense, let alone peace and what's seen. With no self-right fooling and so bothered at lacking love and power.
Conclude and focus: Near thee is less an option. Near -- in attention toward, interaction and engagement. Far -- the wrong and sinful reaction to disturbance. Which is clear and present. Understandable and sign of health. Responsibility is to take eyes off self and in all views 'out there' groans of compassion.
A song. What? Chants of faithfulness from God. And this, volume quiet and help turning God-ward. Again, and again and...
Actually these songs are better -- for me -- and starters to meditate, or whisper along, unaccompanied. Might even watch the bobbling about with the sound down. Remember passion and near thee on the constant is all we really got or need.